What’s that you say? Why would an actress and her wardrobe assistant be scouting locations, instead of, say, a director and a production designer? Hush now, this is a Jess Franco film and logic has no place.
So, these two blonde hotties are in South America when Jane pulls some spectacular turncoat shenanigans and, in cahoots with Chris (Werner Pochath) and Thomas (Antonio de Cabo), kidnaps Laura and hauls her off to a jungle-infested island to wait for the studio head to cough up a $6million ransom. Said island has been glimpsed in the opening montage which juxtaposes Laura’s carefree lifestyle with the chase, capture and sacrifice to a deformed cannibal, of a native girl. Jess Franco drawing parallels, y’all.
While Chris starts going loco because he doesn’t like the jungle (“this wild vegetation gives me the creeps”), Thomas molests Laura and …
What’s that? Aren’t kidnappers supposed to worry about damaged goods/non-provision of spondoolies scenarios? In the real word, maybe, but this a Jesus Franco joint, people, and sexual violence is kind of obligatory.
So, Thomas does the nasty, Jane watches laughingly, and Chris rages at the flora and fauna. Meanwhile the studio hires man-of-action Peter Weston (Al Cliver) to make the ransom payment with the understanding that if he comes back with Laura and the six mill, he gets 10%. Of the money. What he’d do with 10% of an actress I don’t know.
A word on the deformed cannibal: he has ping-pong balls for eyes and plasticene smeared across his face. He also shuffles through the film – and I do mean shuffles; scenes where he ambles towards the camera, arms outstretched, last several minutes at a time – stark bollock naked. Indeed, in his climactic showdown with Peter, his penis flops around all over the place as the two of them grapple. Said fight is as badly staged as anything else on display here, gifting the word with images such as this …